With pillow and blanket in tow and eyes heavy from a long day of playing, he stretches out on the couch beside me. Nudging his head against my arm and sending secret coded messages with those sleepy, puppy dog eyes, he has my full attention. Because these moments, at nine years old, don’t come as often as they once did. I stop typing and softly outline every detail of his face with my fingers by the glow of the computer screen in my lap.
Without thinking, I start singing a familiar song and he smiles. A praise song we first learned together while he snuggled soundly in my belly.
God of wonders beyond our galaxy, You are holy. Holy.
The universe declares Your majesty. You are holy. Holy.
We both grew in that season – he in my belly and I in my spirit (and certainly my flesh, too). God placed this promise of life on the inside of me as cancer made threats on the outside of me. He gave me joy when life tempted to bring me sadness. And He took what the enemy meant to harm me with and used it for good.
And when I look at this beautiful boy next to me my heart grows tender. Every breath he breathes reminds me of God’s mercy and grace. Reminds me that God is a God of second chances. That God’s plans are so much greater than my own. And that this life I’m living is about so much more than the girl I see in the mirror every morning.
Hold your family this weekend, friends. Take time to snuggle on the couch. Trace the freckles and memorize the curves of your child’s face.
Put the computer down. Stop work for a moment. Be fully present.
Breathe in the fullness of this day. No matter what you’re going through find something to be thankful for. Though we walk through seasons of difficulty, God is ever present. His mercy and grace remain, enabling and empowering us to get through to the other side – stronger, better, fuller.
Those hard places we walk (and sometimes crawl) through have a way of changing us. Our perspective. Our priorities. Our way of thinking. Everything, really.
The hard days have a way of opening our eyes to the good days, don’t they?
I’m spending today with my eyes open. And I hope you will, too.
xo
Shelly